You see a woman you’re attracted to, sitting all by herself. You look at her for a brief moment. What you really want is introduce yourself and have a great conversation. Then, with any luck, she’ll be interested in you.
You get a horrible sensation in your stomach. Your mind starts racing, thinking ridiculous thoughts, giving you any excuse in the book why you shouldn’t just say something. Anything. Something as simple as, “Hi, how are you doing today?”
But you can’t. You’re paralyzed. You’re stuck in a situation where you could go introduce yourself–you’ve really got no excuse–but you’re too afraid of what might happen. In fact, you have no idea what might happen, and that’s what makes it frightening.
You’re afraid she may not want to talk to you. You’re afraid you’ll say something stupid, or you might run out of things to say. You’re afraid you’re not tall enough, or not handsome enough, or you’re too fat. You’re afraid she’ll laugh at you.
Does this sound like you?
I definitely feel you there. You have to understand that what’s blocking is not something physical in the real world. It’s all in your head. You believe a hypothesis is true without actually testing it. You’re basically in phase 1 of a scientific experiment. What scientists do is they form a hypothesis in their head as you did, then they go in the lab and do experiments to collect data. Then they analyze the data and only then they draw conclusions.
In your case, you skipped step 2 and step 3. You formed a hypothesis in your head and you skipped directly to step 4 which is “draw conclusions”.
Your conclusions might be false or correct, but until you go out in the real world to confirm them, you will never know. You will be stuck in your head forever.
What you actually need here, is confidence and courage to test your hypothesis. When you are confident you consider yourself valuable no matter what others think of you. And you develop courage when you take action even if you are afraid.
If you want me to help you develop confidence and courage, click here where you can schedule a free consultation with me.